Feeling Guilty

This Sunday morning our doorbell rang at 7:56am and it was one of our darling neighbors... 5 year old Sam asking "Can Lily and Jack come out and play?" Standing in my pajamas just shy of my first cup of coffee...I was totally not prepared for this. Sam has been "knocking" quite a bit this week. He is a doll. I think it is great that he and his two sisters want to play with my little Lily and baby Jack...

BUT- that means that I have to "play" (ie. watch) too!! :)

I was a real trooper this week. Jack, Lily and I, all covered in sunscreen, headed out the front door day after day so that I could watch all five kids play in the front yard in the 90 degree sun. I could feel the brown spots growing on my face that I had worked so hard all winter to fade. I thought to myself 'this is why you have kids when your are young. You don't think about brown spots and and wrinkles and you aren't tired all the time.'

So, this morning when darling Sam arrived I had to think fast. I explained to Sam that we were leaving in a little bit to go to the 'inside playground.' Sam said "Oh, we don't go there." I said "Yes, you are too grown up for that playground."

It wasn't a lie because we really were going there. No matter, I still feel guilty. I wanted to take Jack and Lily to the inside playground because it was nice and cool and I could sit on bench and zone for ONE WHOLE HOUR. Is that awful? Well, if it is or isn't - it definitely is the truth. It is my guilty pleasure. I don't have to worry about pushing swings, getting sand out of eyes, catching them on the slide or anything. For ONE WHOLE HOUR, I can sit there and relax. Then afterwards we get some lunch and a treat and everyone is so happy.

Why do I feel guilty for doing this? I wonder if it means I am slacking? Am I lazy? I don't know...all I know is that I never imagined that one of my guilty pleasures would be sitting at the 'inside playground' at the Paradise Valley Mall.

PS Did I fail to mention how many parents are there with their toddlers? Did I fail to mention how many of them let out big sighs of "ahhhhh" when they sit down next to me and then say "isn't this nice?" :)